7 Keys to Unlocking Your Authentic Self


Hey beauties! I hope you had a magical and fabulous holiday season! The most wonderful time of the year has gone and left faster than the Ebola scare, and as we take down our Christmas trees, sipped the last of the holiday drinks from Starbucks, the ball has dropped at midnight all over the world, and the confetti has been swept away, everyone’s focus is the new year: 2016! Yayyyyyy! We made it! But with a new year, often times, comes a new us…or at least that’s what we strive for. Don’t let the black hearted, cynical individuals make you feel like just another one of the sheep when you say: “New year, new me.” A new day, and of course a new year are always a great opportunity in taking a step closer to your authentic and best self.

But, how do we take those steps to reach our best and fabulous self in 2016? Do not worry; I’ve got the keys:

1. Write Down Your Goals

A vision without a plan is a merely a dream. You can have all the things you want to do swimming inside your head, but who honestly even remembers all of the goals they want to achieve? No one, that’s who, From the biggest to the smallest of things you would like to achieve, to the present and future goals, take my word and write it all down. I’ve found that when I write down or type a specific goal down in my notes app, I’m determined to achieve it. And I do. A goal is a goal is a goal is a goal. Write it down, take a picture, I don’t give a f**k! You can do it!

2. Do Things on Your Own Time

Until you’re six feet under, it’s never too late to start anew. Whatever it is that you want to achieve in the New Year in order to become the person you believe you’re meant to be, you must first start that journey on your own time. We often base our clocks off of what others are doing and when they’re doing it. Stop trying to keep up with the Joneses and the Kardashians, and keep up with yourself.

Back in 2011, I started my weight loss journey at a whopping 305 lbs…in March of that year. When the ball dropped on New Year’s Eve, I wasn’t thinking about changing my diet and getting a gym membership. Eventually, the desire to becoming a healthier me in the physical aspect, arose in March and the first thing I did in that first week of the month, was join a gym and started YouTubing what diet change was best for me. With my 5-year weight loss anniversary coming up, and shedding 110 lbs, my main focus for 2016, is to make short-term goals as far as weight loss goes. I’m not giving myself a timeline; I’m just going to do what works for me and not stressing the time it takes to get to my ultimate goal. It’s not the law to begin any kind of life changing journey in January of any new year. Do what you need to do in the time that’s best. We were all born on different days, at different times, so live your life according to YOUR timeline.

3. Drop the Dead Weight

You ever seen a snake not shed their dead skin when the time has come? No, you haven’t. So why are you still lugging around that heavy load on your back? This is one key that I believe every beauty should learn to do ASAP, and not wait until the New Year has arrived. Dead weight is one of the many things we often carry around with us that holds us back from reaching our authentic self.

What is dead weight you ask? It’s anything and anyone that is not helping you reach your authentic, most positive self, along with your future goals. You have a group of friends that don’t encourage you and your dreams? Separate yourselves from that group. Working a job that isn’t even in your field, and adds stress to your life? Quit. In a relationship with someone that worries you rather than makes you happy? Chuck up the deuces. Got a habit that you know is not good for you? Kick it to the curb. Carrying around dead weight will crash the plane. Pack lightly beauties.

4. Get a Hobby

We all have our things. So find yours if you haven’t. Hobbies are great and you can never have enough of them. A hobby can be anything that promotes peace and tranquility in your life, whether it’s writing, reading, doing DIY (Do It Yourself) projects, exercising, trying the newest restaurants in your city, blogging, collecting certain items, or volunteering. If you have a hobby, keep it going! If you don’t, find one and be great!

5. Love Yourself

Self-love is the best kind of love. It’s a tried and true saying that many of us don’t practice nowadays. The holiday season begins in October and ends in February, so of course you’ve probably been seeing couples and new engagements everywhere you go. Everywhere. And you might find yourself feeling as if you’re a leper for the mere fact that you haven’t had someone to share the holidays with in years, after going on many dates that end up not going any further. That feeling is normal and okay. Who doesn’t want to be in a great relationship, that’s on its way to becoming an everlasting union? Satan, that’s who. However, the most vital key to living that authentic life is to learn to love you before trying to love someone else. Tis true beauty. Tis true. When you love the beauty that is you, you don’t put up with anyone (including friends and co-workers) treating you any ole’ way, you set certain standards that you refuse (and should) to lower for anyone, and best of all, you’re happy when you love yourself. It’s not an easy thing to do, but finding self-love unlocks so many doors that you’ve kept yourself from walking into when you practice self-hate. When you love yourself, you believe you’ll land your dream career, because you deserve it. When you love yourself, you seek a better life, because you know you deserve a fabulous life. When you love yourself, you don’t seek any relationship to void out a lonely night, because you know you deserve unconditional love. Know yourself. Love yourself.

6. Let That Hurt Go….Seriously

“I forgive but I won’t forget” is a phrase created by the hurt! Don’t be on your Rick Ross tip, and not forgive just because God does. That’s called bitterness. Don’t be a bitter beauty. Let. That. Hurt. Go. Just like dead weight, you have to drop past heartbreaks, painful situations and disloyal things people have done to you. Even if you never received a sincere apology or an apology at all from whoever hurt you, forgive them anyways and move it along. Forget about it! The one who suffers the most when we don’t forgive is no one but ourselves. If you’re still caught up on a past situation that still shakes you to the core to this day, you must try your best to let go of the hurt that was put into you. Seek some counseling if you must, if that’s what you feel you need to do. Sometimes all it takes to let go of past situations is to talk about it. Hurt people hurt people, and no one wants to be around a negative Nancy. Holding on to hurt is holding on to energy that kills us every second of every day. Let that hurt go girl.

7. Prosper!

Last but not least, PROSPER! Use this New Year and the future New Years, to prosper in every aspect of life, wherever you see fit. Get ya shine on *insert sunglasses emoji here*.

And with these keys, I do hope you unlock the doors to becoming your most beautiful and authentic self. You deserve it! I wish you a happy, fabulous and blessed New Year!

Treat Yo’ Self Girl and Stay Beautiful!